{"id":7969,"date":"2024-11-30T20:27:19","date_gmt":"2024-11-30T13:27:19","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/blog.youre.vn\/?p=7969"},"modified":"2024-12-15T21:27:38","modified_gmt":"2024-12-15T14:27:38","slug":"essay-1-subconscious-behaviors-that-are-keeping-you-from-having-the-life-you-want","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/blog.youre.org.vn\/en\/essay-1-subconscious-behaviors-that-are-keeping-you-from-having-the-life-you-want\/","title":{"rendered":"B\u00e0i lu\u1eadn s\u1ed1 1: Nh\u1eefng H\u00e0nh Vi V\u00f4 Th\u1ee9c \u0110ang Ng\u0103n C\u1ea3n B\u1ea1n S\u1ed1ng Cu\u1ed9c \u0110\u1eddi M\u01a1 \u01af\u1edbc"},"content":{"rendered":"<p class=\"has-nv-dark-bg-color has-text-color has-link-color has-medium-font-size wp-elements-60dff08fbed3c417a41fa815d83803c0\"><strong>L\u1eddi chia s\u1ebb t\u1eeb th\u1ea7y<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-nv-light-bg-color has-text-color has-link-color has-medium-font-size wp-elements-cd844322b8a99a02427308749aa56243\">C\u00e1c em th\u00e2n m\u1ebfn,<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-nv-light-bg-color has-text-color has-link-color has-medium-font-size wp-elements-af1fc29d46805d3bb03fa36a06c5c9a6\">Th\u1ea7y bi\u1ebft r\u1eb1ng \u0111\u00f4i khi qu\u00e1 kh\u1ee9 c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 tr\u1edf th\u00e0nh g\u00e1nh n\u1eb7ng l\u1edbn trong cu\u1ed9c s\u1ed1ng. Ch\u00fang ta th\u01b0\u1eddng ngh\u0129 r\u1eb1ng nh\u1eefng g\u00ec \u0111\u00e3 x\u1ea3y ra s\u1ebd m\u00e3i m\u00e3i \u0111\u1ecbnh h\u00ecnh v\u00e0 gi\u1edbi h\u1ea1n m\u00ecnh, nh\u01b0ng th\u1ef1c ra, qu\u00e1 kh\u1ee9 ch\u1ec9 l\u00e0 m\u1ed9t ph\u1ea7n c\u1ee7a h\u00e0nh tr\u00ecnh. \u0110i\u1ec1u quan tr\u1ecdng l\u00e0 c\u00e1ch ch\u00fang ta nh\u00ecn nh\u1eadn v\u00e0 \u0111\u00f3n nh\u1eadn n\u00f3. N\u1ebfu c\u00e1c em ch\u1ec9 t\u1eadp trung v\u00e0o nh\u1eefng v\u1ea5p ng\u00e3 hay t\u1ed5n th\u01b0\u01a1ng, th\u00ec qu\u00e1 kh\u1ee9 c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 tr\u1edf th\u00e0nh m\u1ed9t c\u00e1i b\u00f3ng c\u1ea3n b\u01b0\u1edbc t\u01b0\u01a1ng lai. Nh\u01b0ng n\u1ebfu c\u00e1c em nh\u00ecn l\u1ea1i, hi\u1ec3u r\u1eb1ng m\u1ed7i tr\u1ea3i nghi\u1ec7m \u0111\u1ec1u l\u00e0 m\u1ed9t ph\u1ea7n quan tr\u1ecdng gi\u00fap c\u00e1c em tr\u01b0\u1edfng th\u00e0nh, th\u00ec c\u00e1c em s\u1ebd th\u1ea5y qu\u00e1 kh\u1ee9 \u0111\u00e3 g\u00f3p ph\u1ea7n t\u1ea1o n\u00ean s\u1ee9c m\u1ea1nh c\u1ee7a m\u00ecnh.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-nv-light-bg-color has-text-color has-link-color has-medium-font-size wp-elements-2bb3bf8b571f3f441fd0c306553341a2\">Th\u1ea7y mu\u1ed1n c\u00e1c em hi\u1ec3u r\u1eb1ng, vi\u1ec7c nh\u00ecn nh\u1eadn l\u1ea1i nh\u1eefng k\u00fd \u1ee9c kh\u00f4ng c\u00f3 ngh\u0129a l\u00e0 ph\u1ea3i b\u1ecf qua hay ch\u1ed1i b\u1ecf nh\u1eefng tr\u1ea3i nghi\u1ec7m \u0111au bu\u1ed3n. Thay v\u00e0o \u0111\u00f3, h\u00e3y h\u1ecdc c\u00e1ch \u0111\u00f3n nh\u1eadn ch\u00fang nh\u01b0 m\u1ed9t ph\u1ea7n c\u1ee7a c\u00e2u chuy\u1ec7n c\u00e1 nh\u00e2n v\u00e0 ti\u1ebfn v\u1ec1 ph\u00eda tr\u01b0\u1edbc v\u1edbi l\u00f2ng bi\u1ebft \u01a1n v\u00e0 s\u1ef1 tr\u01b0\u1edfng th\u00e0nh. B\u1ea3n th\u00e2n th\u1ea7y t\u1eebng tr\u1ea3i qua nhi\u1ec1u kh\u00f3 kh\u0103n, v\u00e0 ch\u00ednh nh\u1edd h\u1ecdc c\u00e1ch nh\u00ecn nh\u1eadn l\u1ea1i, th\u1ea7y m\u1edbi th\u1ea5y m\u00ecnh \u0111\u00e3 h\u1ecdc \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c g\u00ec t\u1eeb ch\u00fang. M\u1ed7i tr\u1ea3i nghi\u1ec7m, d\u00f9 t\u1ed1t hay x\u1ea5u, \u0111\u1ec1u l\u00e0 m\u1ed9t vi\u00ean g\u1ea1ch x\u00e2y n\u00ean b\u1ea3n th\u00e2n c\u00e1c em h\u00f4m nay.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-nv-light-bg-color has-text-color has-link-color has-medium-font-size wp-elements-d18f1c50462d33364a6b856cc019da13\">H\u00e3y \u0111\u1ec3 qu\u00e1 kh\u1ee9 l\u00e0 \u0111i\u1ec3m t\u1ef1a \u0111\u1ec3 c\u00e1c em ti\u1ebfn xa h\u01a1n, kh\u00f4ng ph\u1ea3i l\u00e0 gi\u1edbi h\u1ea1n giam c\u1ea7m m\u00ecnh.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-align-right has-nv-text-dark-bg-color has-text-color has-link-color has-medium-font-size wp-elements-7942654d3128d48364e8bc8ee5744db6\"><strong>Th\u1ea7y lu\u00f4n tin t\u01b0\u1edfng c\u00e1c em.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-image\">\n<figure class=\"aligncenter size-full\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"760\" height=\"570\" src=\"https:\/\/blog.youre.vn\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/11\/Picture1.png\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-7971\" srcset=\"https:\/\/blog.youre.org.vn\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/11\/Picture1.png 760w, https:\/\/blog.youre.org.vn\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/11\/Picture1-300x225.png 300w, https:\/\/blog.youre.org.vn\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/11\/Picture1-16x12.png 16w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 760px) 100vw, 760px\" \/><\/figure>\n<\/div>\n\n\n<p><\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading has-nv-dark-bg-color has-text-color has-link-color wp-elements-93e8447683738d302fd2a6a7e5168d0e\">Essay 1: Subconscious Behaviors That Are Keeping You From Having The Life You Want<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-nv-light-bg-color has-text-color has-link-color has-medium-font-size wp-elements-b9abee7cbf79a08d8a2b436e1123e4a2\">Every generation has a \u201cmonoculture\u201d of sorts, a governing pattern or system of beliefs that people unconsciously accept as \u201ctruth.\u201d It\u2019s easy to identify the monoculture of Germany in the 1930s or America in 1776. It\u2019s clear what people at those times, in those places, accepted to be \u201cgood\u201d and \u201ctrue\u201d even when in reality, that was certainly not always the case. The objectivity required to see the effects of present monoculture is very difficult to develop. Once you have so deeply accepted an idea as \u201ctruth\u201d it doesn\u2019t register as \u201ccultural\u201d or \u201csubjective\u201d anymore. So much of our inner turmoil is the result of conducting a life we don\u2019t inherently desire, only because we have accepted an inner narrative of \u201cnormal\u201d and \u201cideal\u201d without ever realizing. The fundamentals of any given monoculture tend to surround what we should be living for (nation, religion, self, etc.) and there are a number of ways in which our current system has us shooting ourselves in the feet as we try to step forward. Here, 8 of the most pervasive.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ol class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li class=\"has-neve-link-color-color has-text-color has-link-color has-medium-font-size wp-elements-7a98358c1e6f122d25d62c60d52f1ad5\"><strong>You believe that creating your best life is a matter of deciding what you want and then going after it, but in reality, you are psychologically incapable of being able to predict what will make you happy. <\/strong><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-nv-light-bg-color has-text-color has-link-color has-medium-font-size wp-elements-f1b8aa832b9ec691992054a0bbdc31d0\">Your brain can only perceive what it\u2019s known, so when you choose what you want for the future, you\u2019re actually just recreating a solution or an ideal of the past. When things don\u2019t work out the way you want them to, you think you\u2019ve failed only because you didn\u2019t re-create something you perceived as desirable. In reality, you likely created something better, but foreign, and your brain misinterpreted it as \u201cbad\u201d because of that. (Moral of the story: Living in the moment isn\u2019t a lofty ideal reserved for the Zen and enlightened; it\u2019s the only way to live a life that isn\u2019t infiltrated with illusions. It\u2019s the only thing your brain can actually comprehend.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-neve-link-color-color has-text-color has-link-color has-medium-font-size wp-elements-76c8bcb15a40af7d21413be76d100988\">2. <strong><strong>You extrapolate the present moment because you believe that success is somewhere you \u201carrive,\u201d so you are constantly trying to take a snapshot of your life and see if you can be happy yet.<\/strong><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-nv-light-bg-color has-text-color has-link-color has-medium-font-size wp-elements-68c199b8befa40fe06ba2124a925d9fa\">You convince yourself that any given moment is representative of your life as a whole. Because we\u2019re wired to believe that success is somewhere we get to\u2014when goals are accomplished and things are completed\u2014we\u2019re constantly measuring our present moments by how \u201cfinished\u201d they are, how good the story sounds, how someone else would judge the elevator speech. We find ourselves thinking: \u201cIs this all there is?\u201d because we forget that everything is transitory, and no one single instance can summarize the whole. There is nowhere to \u201carrive\u201d to. The only thing you\u2019re rushing toward is death. Accomplishing goals is not success. How much you expand in the process is.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-neve-link-color-color has-text-color has-link-color has-medium-font-size wp-elements-2eec38418bbfe47a440e825fbe58ed16\">3. <strong><strong><strong>You assume that when it comes to following your \u201cgut instincts,\u201d happiness is \u201cgood\u201d and fear and pain are \u201cbad.\u201d<\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-nv-light-bg-color has-text-color has-link-color has-medium-font-size wp-elements-5a1fb0ada455fe692d7bf767a7e19ba5\">When you consider doing something that you truly love and are invested in, you are going to feel an influx of fear and pain, mostly because it will involve being vulnerable. Bad feelings should not always be interpreted as deterrents. They are also indicators that you are doing something frightening and worthwhile. Not wanting to do something would make you feel indifferent about it. Fear = interest.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-neve-link-color-color has-text-color has-link-color has-medium-font-size wp-elements-5c6f98f981db9220ceba328073915ef7\">4. <strong><strong><strong><strong>You needlessly create problems and crises in your life because you\u2019re afraid of actually living it.<\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-nv-light-bg-color has-text-color has-link-color has-medium-font-size wp-elements-ff189881eaaa4935932a668312d49cd5\">The pattern of unnecessarily creating crises in your life is actually an avoidance technique. It distracts you from actually having to be vulnerable or held accountable for whatever it is you\u2019re afraid of. You\u2019re never upset for the reason you think you are: At the core of your desire to create a problem is simply the fear of being who you are and living the life you want.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-neve-link-color-color has-text-color has-link-color has-medium-font-size wp-elements-6e1c9806bbd6e2bc95f322c316a368b5\">5. <strong><strong><strong><strong>You think that to change your beliefs, you have to adopt a new line of thinking, rather than seek experiences that make that thinking self-evident.<\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-nv-light-bg-color has-text-color has-link-color has-medium-font-size wp-elements-64c72e46c4ac490f64a3a5cbbd38f0a7\"> A belief is what you know to be true because experience has made it evident to you. If you want to change your life, change your beliefs. If you want to change your beliefs, go out and have experiences that make them real to you. Not the opposite way around.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-neve-link-color-color has-text-color has-link-color has-medium-font-size wp-elements-f6a67f79b61d679f06ea2e5efd9ef9de\">6. <strong><strong><strong><strong><strong>You think \u201cproblems\u201d are roadblocks to achieving what you want, when in reality they are pathways.<\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/strong> <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Marcus Aurelius sums this up well: \u201cThe impediment to action advances action. What stands in the way becomes the way.\u201d Simply, running into a \u201cproblem\u201d forces you to take action to resolve it. That action will inevitably lead you to think differently, behave differently, and choose differently. The \u201cproblem\u201d becomes a catalyst for you to actualize the life you always wanted. It pushes you from your comfort zone, that\u2019s all.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-neve-link-color-color has-text-color has-link-color has-medium-font-size wp-elements-ef875c6d444d9d2b025f0319f1f2e6e0\">7. <strong>You think your past defines you, and worse, you think that it is an unchangeable reality, when really, your perception of it changes as you do.<\/strong> <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-nv-light-bg-color has-text-color has-link-color has-medium-font-size wp-elements-89b01f72e09828ec760ecbacff560e07\">Because experience is always multi-dimensional, there are a variety of memories, experiences, feelings, \u201cgists\u201d you can choose to recall\u2026and what you choose is indicative of your present state of mind. So many people get caught up in allowing the past to define them or haunt them simply because they have not evolved to the place of seeing how the past did not prevent them from achieving the life they want, it facilitated it. This doesn\u2019t mean to disregard or gloss over painful or traumatic events, but simply to be able to recall them with acceptance and to be able to place them in the storyline of your personal evolution.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-neve-link-color-color has-text-color has-link-color has-medium-font-size wp-elements-95f128498e2fcf6a57f925f5f325565a\">8. <strong><strong>You try to change other people, situations, and things (or you just complain\/get upset about them) when anger = self-recognition. Most negative emotional reactions are you identifying a disassociated aspect of yourself.<\/strong><\/strong> <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-nv-light-bg-color has-text-color has-link-color has-medium-font-size wp-elements-a89739e63e77fc218e0843e1ea3daa95\">Your \u201cshadow selves\u201d are the parts of you that at some point you were conditioned to believe were \u201cnot okay,\u201d so you suppressed them and have done everything in your power not to acknowledge them. You don\u2019t actually dislike these parts of yourself, though. So when you see somebody else displaying one of these traits, it\u2019s infuriating, not because you inherently dislike it, but because you have to fight your desire to fully integrate it into your whole consciousness. The things you love about others are the things you love about yourself. The things you hate about others are the things you cannot see in yourself.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-align-right has-medium-font-size\"><strong>Brianna Wiest<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>L\u1eddi chia s\u1ebb t\u1eeb th\u1ea7y C\u00e1c em th\u00e2n m\u1ebfn, Th\u1ea7y bi\u1ebft r\u1eb1ng \u0111\u00f4i khi qu\u00e1 kh\u1ee9 c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 tr\u1edf th\u00e0nh g\u00e1nh n\u1eb7ng l\u1edbn trong cu\u1ed9c s\u1ed1ng. Ch\u00fang ta th\u01b0\u1eddng ngh\u0129 r\u1eb1ng nh\u1eefng g\u00ec \u0111\u00e3 x\u1ea3y ra s\u1ebd m\u00e3i m\u00e3i \u0111\u1ecbnh h\u00ecnh v\u00e0 gi\u1edbi h\u1ea1n m\u00ecnh, nh\u01b0ng th\u1ef1c ra, qu\u00e1 kh\u1ee9 ch\u1ec9 l\u00e0 m\u1ed9t ph\u1ea7n c\u1ee7a&hellip;&nbsp;<a href=\"https:\/\/blog.youre.org.vn\/en\/essay-1-subconscious-behaviors-that-are-keeping-you-from-having-the-life-you-want\/\" class=\"\" rel=\"bookmark\">\u0110\u1ecdc th\u00eam \u00bb<span class=\"screen-reader-text\">B\u00e0i lu\u1eadn s\u1ed1 1: Nh\u1eefng H\u00e0nh Vi V\u00f4 Th\u1ee9c \u0110ang Ng\u0103n C\u1ea3n B\u1ea1n S\u1ed1ng Cu\u1ed9c \u0110\u1eddi M\u01a1 \u01af\u1edbc<\/span><\/a><\/p>","protected":false},"author":10,"featured_media":7974,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"neve_meta_sidebar":"","neve_meta_container":"","neve_meta_enable_content_width":"","neve_meta_content_width":0,"neve_meta_title_alignment":"","neve_meta_author_avatar":"","neve_post_elements_order":"","neve_meta_disable_header":"","neve_meta_disable_footer":"","neve_meta_disable_title":"","neve_meta_reading_time":"","_ti_tpc_template_sync":false,"_ti_tpc_template_id":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[86],"tags":[81,78,80,79,124,123],"class_list":["post-7969","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-thu-vien-tin-tuc-youreorg","tag-change","tag-essay","tag-growth","tag-mindset","tag-monoculture","tag-subconscious-behaviors"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v22.6 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>B\u00e0i lu\u1eadn s\u1ed1 1: Nh\u1eefng H\u00e0nh Vi V\u00f4 Th\u1ee9c \u0110ang Ng\u0103n C\u1ea3n B\u1ea1n S\u1ed1ng Cu\u1ed9c \u0110\u1eddi M\u01a1 \u01af\u1edbc - YOUREORG Blog<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Kh\u00e1m ph\u00e1 8 c\u00e1ch m\u00e0 h\u1ec7 th\u1ed1ng ni\u1ec1m tin v\u00f4 th\u1ee9c (monoculture) \u0111ang \u1ea3nh h\u01b0\u1edfng \u0111\u1ebfn cu\u1ed9c s\u1ed1ng hi\u1ec7n t\u1ea1i c\u1ee7a b\u1ea1n. 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